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December 22, 1998

What's Up With That?
by Tom Kuzeja
 

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Happy Hollandaise

Hello all and welcome to the end of another year on this nutty little blue ball we call Earth.  I just love this time of year.  People are more festive and seem to be celebrating the spirit of the holidays.   Whether it's a simple "I'm sorry" spoken as someone tramples you on the way to grab the last Furby off the shelf (and we all know sex sells... Furby sounds like the name of a lewd act if you ask me) or the whimsical "flipping of the bird" in a bright red woolen mitten as someone cuts you off in traffic, you just can't escape all the good will.  And damn it, why would you want to?

I can't help but reminisce about all the holidays of my youth.   There was the time that I knocked over the Christmas tree,  the time my tongue got stuck to the metal on my sled and the time when I stuck my fingers in the wall socket as I was messing around with a window candle.  Ha ha ha... yes, very good times indeed.   I remember watching Christmas specials on T.V. when the duration of the program was indeed greater than the length of its commercials.  I remember Dolly Madison commercials during the Charlie Brown Christmas special.  Has anyone on this planet ever seen a Dolly Madison product?  I haven't.

I remember when it used to snow in December, before Global Warming, when you could make a snowman that wouldn't melt for weeks.

I remember that sweet smell of a freshly unpacked artificial tree and the satisfaction of standing back to admire the completed assembly.  I remember the year I assembled the tree upside down putting the largest branches on top and the smallest ones on the bottom.  Ha ha ha.  I remember not having dessert that night.

It's fun to look back but it's also important to live in the moment.  We can all create new traditions.  Why just this weekend, I completed the MudAndLeavesMan standing in my front yard.  Sure, he's quite frightening at first glance, but he grows on you.  Apparently some kids in the neighborhood have started their own little tradition called "The Smashing o' the Mailboxes".  Those kids!  I bet they'll be getting coal in their stockings this year.

Most importantly, let us not forget the deeper meaning of the holidays.  It's a time for sharing,  a time for charity.  I don't know about you, but let me tell ya, I work for charity everyday.  They tell me it's good for my soul.

I'd like to take this time to wish all three of my readers a happy and healthy holiday season.  Practice a little kindness.  Reach out to someone less fortunate.   Never buy a Furby from anyone on the street.  And remember to smile anytime you cut someone off in traffic.

May 16, 1966 
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